mom, don't read this one.

I have had the pleasure of spending this summer in Ft. Lewis, Washington.
My first month in Washington was spent getting evaluated on my leadership capabilities. It was a joy. I never want to do it again.

In the meantime, we'll discuss my present situation.

I am living in the King Oscar Motel while completing a behavioral health internship at the hospital on post. I have had the opportunity to observe some incredible things, most of them happening right outside my hotel room.

Authors Note: While I was writing this entry, I was looking for an accurate adjective to describe my current neighborhood. In the process of searching thesaurus.com, this is what I learned-

Main Entry: ghetto
Part of Speech: noun
Definition: slum
Synonyms: public squalor, rundown section of a city
Notes: a slum and a ghetto are different- if everyone is ethnically similar, it is a ghetto and if everyone is basically poor, it is a slum.
     According to this definition, I am living in a slum, not a ghetto. Now I know!

While I have tried to take photos of as many of the incredible scenes I am surrounded by, I have not been able to photograph my most recent observation.
The hotel next to the King Oscar got new bars on its windows. I think that this hotel is trying to expand its demographic. The bars installed on the office windows are similar to the ones pictured to the right.
"Fancy Bars" if you will?

While I really would love to provide you with a true-to-life photo, the security guard who we have guarding our parking lot highly discourages interaction with that particular hotel due to the high volume of prostitutes.
For your entertainment, at the expense of my safety and/or sanity, the following are a few other highlights from my life here in this cultural cesspool.  

I took this picture to the right as we were checking in. This is when I had my first inclination that things were going to be good.
Please notice: the mail box.
I truly believe no commentary is necessary here. This photo pretty much speaks for itself.
Side note: I am pretty sure that the woman in this picture is moonlighting at the mobile taco trailer located right next to our parking lot. I am not entirely positive due to the fact that I choose not to eat there, avoiding death by dysentery.
    
I am aware that this next one is nearly impossible to read, but I still feel it had to be added as an actual photo just for proof of existence.
The sign on the building reads, "100's of beautiful girls and 3 ugly ones. Coast to Coast, where the party never ends."
I'm pretty positive it is a joke. I decided I'm not too concerned with confirming the actual amount of ugly women, avoiding death by AIDS. 
    
As you can imagine, there have been a myriad of unique vehicles that I have had the opportunity to observe. These two pictures represent my favorites so far.
The beautiful King Oscar motel features its own restaurant and lounge. This is the venue where, according to the sign simultaneously welcoming truckers and advertising karaoke, the newlywed Harrison couple chose to celebrate their wedding day.  We knew it was their special day; on account of the giant tribal flame limousine.  Rumor has it the Taco Truck catered the event. 

Coming in second place, is a car that frequents the neighborhood. Sometimes I wonder if he just drives in circles to show off his ride. Other times I wonder if he has any contribution to the ‘extracurricular’ activities that so frequently occur in the area.  Again, this one just kind of speaks for itself.
      
This final picture is a personal favorite from the collection. One evening as I was admiring the oh so sumptuous art framed above my bed, I noticed the wall paper just slightly peeling away towards the bottom of the frame. So I moved the frame, only to find something slightly disturbing yet wildly entertaining. 

It is a hole. In the wall. Above my bed.

 

Under normal circumstances, I may attribute this to a decorating decision change, leaving a small puncture in the wallpaper. In the King Oscar, that is not an option. Currently bullet is the leading guess among the interns, as the paper is slightly more pushed IN to the wall, rather than fanning out. But please, don’t let that influence your guess! Peep hole is still in a close second.

I am pretty sure this is another example of something I should stifle my curiosity towards, avoiding death by sexual predator? So rather than investigate, I choose to publicly speculate.   
I used to think ‘slumming it’ meant wearing sweatpants all the time and dating men in the 350+ weight class.
     Oh how little did I know…